Worried Sick

I've been sick for a couple of days, and didn't feel much like posting anything.

The biggest trouble with being sick, at least for me, is that I always imagine it's worse than it is, or may become so. It was especially true this time because at first I didn't know I was sick; I thought I was just having very bad indigestion.

So I'm lying there feverish and about half delirious thinking, "I wonder if this is it. I wonder if my guts have shut down completely and they're never going to start working again. I wonder if I'm going to have to have a colostomy."

"And I've been feeling so good, too. But everything catches up with sinners eventually. Oh, well, like Mark Twain said 'If I'd known I was going to live this long, I would have taken better care of myself.'

"So let me see, this person gets 20 percent, that person gets 20, this other person gets 40...savings should cover the Neptune Society. I want to be cremated wearing all denim -- shirt, jeans, jacket, hat -- except for my underwear and socks and Birkenstocks. Funny, but I'm not scared at all, except I'm sorry to have to take such a hasty and unexpected departure from those people who (for reasons only they understand) love me and like having me around."

Next night, same thing. I actually even thought about calling a Catholic priest for baptism and last rites. I knew this was very, very serious. I hadn't had a cup of coffee for two days.

After floating around in the miasma of such cheerful thoughts, I woke up this morning hungry, and wanting coffee.

Time to get up and go to work. Another day, another dollar.